⚓️⚓️Avast me hearties! This be Captain Jack Sparrow,
Scourge of the Seven Seas, I’ve sailed to the end of the world gathering me bounty. I’ve battled sea beasts and lost me eye.
There is no greater pirate than me! But don’t be sneakin up on me now lads, coz ye don’t want to walkin the plank for scarin’ a fella do ya!!
But I’ll let ye in on a secret. I be on the wrong side of mighty Davy Jones and he has been on me tail these last years blast him. If I don’t port soon and go into hiding he will add me to his locker.
Alas me hearties all that time at sea alone being chased by Davy Jones, kept away from civilisation and Barnacle (hooman) company has taken a grave toll on my soul, unfortunately even my own shadow can scare me. I have become a little bit of a recluse and very timid, I am only just beginning to accept and allow any type of physical contact. I sure you can understand and accept becoming the perfect land lubber you desire will take a lot of time and a lot of patience, but I can promise you I will be worth it.
I do however, need to come ashore and find myself the perfect barnacle (Hooman) who will teach me trust and the joys of being part of the crew again, I really do want to be loved and sing a YO HO HO at your side.
So get to work me hearties. Finds me a port soon or we’ll all be guests of Davy Jones’ Locker.